Why You Need To Know What You Want
By Sharon Moore on December 19, 2013
Imagine this.
One Saturday morning, a great idea came to your mind – what about a road trip? So you packed a number of clothes. It’s going to be fun, that’s all you are certain of. As the engine starts, you suddenly realised that you haven’t thought of where to go yet. “Wherever these wheels take me”, you said. Okay. So you drive. One, two, three, four hours have past. You just kept driving. Uh-oh, you forgot to bring some food and water, so your focus quickly shifted from where to go to where the nearest convenient store is. Thankfully, you found a small store. Whew. But they’re only selling a few food items and most of them are nothing but junk foods. You just had a promise to yourself that you will start eating healthy. But you have no choice. So you settled for the unhealthy stuff. Back to the car – in one, two, and three – you’re driving again.
It’s already 5 in the afternoon and you still can’t decide where to go. Your lower back is starting to ache and you’re starting to get bored. You have no one to talk to. Oh, you should have invited your friends. You felt upset and irritated. You just want to go home. So you drove several hours back to your apartment.
The day is over. You felt so bad because your day didn’t go well. It was, supposedly, a good day. It isn’t what you planned. Oh, you forgot – you haven’t really planned at all.
Hope this simple scenario has made you realised how boring and upsetting life can be without you knowing what you want to do.
Seek, and you shall find – so goes a popular saying. Life is a whole different experience when you understand what guides you, what motivates you, and what gives you zeal and enthusiasm to carry on with your journey. If you ask Sigmund Freud of why we do things we do, he would tell you that the human behaviour is motivated by sex and aggression. That’s true but on a completely primal level. Today, we live not just for these things. Viktor Frankl, an Austrian existential psychologist who pioneered the school of thought known as logotherapy, found that our dominant driving force is to find meaning in life.
Purpose – it is a very unique phenomenon that you alone could figure out; although others can help you find it by providing guidance and support. Purpose gives us direction in life, opening every opportunity to live it in the best way we can. When we are able to identify what we need, we are able to plan carefully on how we can get it, your mind will actually be motivated to find the best ways for us. This lowers the chance of failed attempts and wasted efforts.
When we are unaware of our needs, we tend to act based on our feelings or impulses. Unfortunately, not all of our impulses take us to the right path or to where we really wanted to be – to where we can be happier. It also makes us feel as if we have no choice, so we end up settling for less.
According to Frankl, there are two types of purpose we need to figure out in our life – the ‘micro’ and the ‘macro’. Your micro-level purpose is to know your values, and then, be in integrity with them. When you fully know and understand what you stand for and what you believe in, you can keep your composure no matter how difficult the situation is. Meanwhile, your macro-level purpose is your search for meaning. It’s like waking up in the morning knowing that you are on the right path (the path that makes you happy), regardless of what other people say.
If you’re like most people, it could be that you’re still unclear of what your purpose in life is until now. Don’t feel bad and don’t rush. You’ll get there. Just don’t forget these three important things – your values, strengths, and passions. They all will guide you to finding out what you really want and need in life.
One Saturday morning, a great idea came to your mind – what about a road trip? So you packed a number of clothes. It’s going to be fun, that’s all you are certain of. As the engine starts, you suddenly realised that you haven’t thought of where to go yet. “Wherever these wheels take me”, you said. Okay. So you drive. One, two, three, four hours have past. You just kept driving. Uh-oh, you forgot to bring some food and water, so your focus quickly shifted from where to go to where the nearest convenient store is. Thankfully, you found a small store. Whew. But they’re only selling a few food items and most of them are nothing but junk foods. You just had a promise to yourself that you will start eating healthy. But you have no choice. So you settled for the unhealthy stuff. Back to the car – in one, two, and three – you’re driving again.
It’s already 5 in the afternoon and you still can’t decide where to go. Your lower back is starting to ache and you’re starting to get bored. You have no one to talk to. Oh, you should have invited your friends. You felt upset and irritated. You just want to go home. So you drove several hours back to your apartment.
The day is over. You felt so bad because your day didn’t go well. It was, supposedly, a good day. It isn’t what you planned. Oh, you forgot – you haven’t really planned at all.
Hope this simple scenario has made you realised how boring and upsetting life can be without you knowing what you want to do.
Seek, and you shall find – so goes a popular saying. Life is a whole different experience when you understand what guides you, what motivates you, and what gives you zeal and enthusiasm to carry on with your journey. If you ask Sigmund Freud of why we do things we do, he would tell you that the human behaviour is motivated by sex and aggression. That’s true but on a completely primal level. Today, we live not just for these things. Viktor Frankl, an Austrian existential psychologist who pioneered the school of thought known as logotherapy, found that our dominant driving force is to find meaning in life.
Purpose – it is a very unique phenomenon that you alone could figure out; although others can help you find it by providing guidance and support. Purpose gives us direction in life, opening every opportunity to live it in the best way we can. When we are able to identify what we need, we are able to plan carefully on how we can get it, your mind will actually be motivated to find the best ways for us. This lowers the chance of failed attempts and wasted efforts.
When we are unaware of our needs, we tend to act based on our feelings or impulses. Unfortunately, not all of our impulses take us to the right path or to where we really wanted to be – to where we can be happier. It also makes us feel as if we have no choice, so we end up settling for less.
According to Frankl, there are two types of purpose we need to figure out in our life – the ‘micro’ and the ‘macro’. Your micro-level purpose is to know your values, and then, be in integrity with them. When you fully know and understand what you stand for and what you believe in, you can keep your composure no matter how difficult the situation is. Meanwhile, your macro-level purpose is your search for meaning. It’s like waking up in the morning knowing that you are on the right path (the path that makes you happy), regardless of what other people say.
If you’re like most people, it could be that you’re still unclear of what your purpose in life is until now. Don’t feel bad and don’t rush. You’ll get there. Just don’t forget these three important things – your values, strengths, and passions. They all will guide you to finding out what you really want and need in life.
10 Ways to Avoid Overeating (and Feeling Guilty) this Holiday Season
By Lisa Franchi on December 19, 2013
Let’s face it – this time of the year is often centred on food. There are special dinners and get-togethers everywhere. Festivity parties are irresistible, knowing that each one will be bringing their specialty dish. This is the time of the year when we get to enjoy great food and we have a very good excuse to indulge!
But overeating during holidays leave many people feeling guilty especially when they notice that they have actually gained a few pounds. Well, this is really not too bad as long as we are able to get back on track next year and work out those excess fats. But if you are still concerned about gaining weight this holiday season, we have a number of tips for you. It is certainly possible that you enjoy and indulge without overeating… and feeling guilty!
Spare your tummy for the foods you really enjoy. Don’t eat cookies and junk foods just because they are sitting there or others are enjoying them. Unless you really want them, spare your tummy for other foods – those that you really love to indulge in. And because it’s holiday season, there are going to be endless buffets featuring tantalising foods. Forget about the rest and simply focus on the foods you want.
Choose red plate. In 2012, a group of German and Swiss researchers found that people who are given meals served on a red plate reduced their food intake by as much as 40 per cent. According to them, the colour red may work like a subtle stop signal – like a red traffic light – telling them not to overeat.
Eat healthy most of the time. If you can’t resist the calorie-dense junk foods served in parties and get-togethers, try as much as possible to eat healthy when you’re at home. Replace those bags of cookies with fresh produce like fruits and vegetables and take those fizzy drinks from your fridge and replace them with smoothie drinks and other healthy beverages. This way, you won’t feel guilty whenever you indulge in not-so-healthy meals at holiday parties.
Watch your portion. It’s perfectly okay to get some of this and some of that, as long as you are keeping an eye on your food portions. A great strategy is to get bigger portions of the healthy stuff and small portions of the calorie-dense, unhealthy food choices. And don’t forget to watch over the calories you are consuming from beverages. Commercial juice varieties, as well as some beers and spirits are very high in calories. What’s more, they contain large amounts of sugar too.
Drink plenty of water. A glass of water 30 minutes or when getting ready before mealtime can reduce your hunger pangs or food cravings, making you less likely to overeat. It also helps prevent indigestion, which is common during the holiday season.
Stock up healthy snacks. If you are going out of town for a vacation, pick up a few healthy snacks just as you would get some bottled water. This will prevent you from indulging in unhealthy snacks along the way.
Don’t skip breakfast. Just because you will be attending a lunch party doesn’t mean you should forego breakfast. Eating a healthy, fulfilling meal in the morning could save you from a calorie splurge later in the day. Opt for protein-filled foods like lean chicken, hard-boiled egg, a slice or two of brown bread, and freshly squeezed orange juice.
Go easy at 6pm onwards. Eating late on holidays is common. If you’re craving for pasta, rice and other calorie-dense meals, eat them at lunch. Enjoy fresh vegetable salad, sandwich and a glass of wine maybe for dinner.
Be alcohol savvy. Alternate alcoholic drinks with water to avoid hangover and dehydration. You will also be reducing your calorie intake this way. Furthermore, try spirits with low-calorie mixers and don’t forget to “drink moderately”.
Drop the guilt. It won’t help you with anything – it will just make you feel worse this holiday season. What’s more, new research from the University of Canterbury in New Zealand has found that people who felt guilty after overeating tend to gain more weight than those who didn’t feel guilty. The researchers emphasised that the diet controlling habit of guilt ridden-women gets abandoned once they are guilt ridden.
Hope you find these tips useful. Have a wonderful, delicious and fulfilling holiday ahead!
But overeating during holidays leave many people feeling guilty especially when they notice that they have actually gained a few pounds. Well, this is really not too bad as long as we are able to get back on track next year and work out those excess fats. But if you are still concerned about gaining weight this holiday season, we have a number of tips for you. It is certainly possible that you enjoy and indulge without overeating… and feeling guilty!
Spare your tummy for the foods you really enjoy. Don’t eat cookies and junk foods just because they are sitting there or others are enjoying them. Unless you really want them, spare your tummy for other foods – those that you really love to indulge in. And because it’s holiday season, there are going to be endless buffets featuring tantalising foods. Forget about the rest and simply focus on the foods you want.
Choose red plate. In 2012, a group of German and Swiss researchers found that people who are given meals served on a red plate reduced their food intake by as much as 40 per cent. According to them, the colour red may work like a subtle stop signal – like a red traffic light – telling them not to overeat.
Eat healthy most of the time. If you can’t resist the calorie-dense junk foods served in parties and get-togethers, try as much as possible to eat healthy when you’re at home. Replace those bags of cookies with fresh produce like fruits and vegetables and take those fizzy drinks from your fridge and replace them with smoothie drinks and other healthy beverages. This way, you won’t feel guilty whenever you indulge in not-so-healthy meals at holiday parties.
Watch your portion. It’s perfectly okay to get some of this and some of that, as long as you are keeping an eye on your food portions. A great strategy is to get bigger portions of the healthy stuff and small portions of the calorie-dense, unhealthy food choices. And don’t forget to watch over the calories you are consuming from beverages. Commercial juice varieties, as well as some beers and spirits are very high in calories. What’s more, they contain large amounts of sugar too.
Drink plenty of water. A glass of water 30 minutes or when getting ready before mealtime can reduce your hunger pangs or food cravings, making you less likely to overeat. It also helps prevent indigestion, which is common during the holiday season.
Stock up healthy snacks. If you are going out of town for a vacation, pick up a few healthy snacks just as you would get some bottled water. This will prevent you from indulging in unhealthy snacks along the way.
Don’t skip breakfast. Just because you will be attending a lunch party doesn’t mean you should forego breakfast. Eating a healthy, fulfilling meal in the morning could save you from a calorie splurge later in the day. Opt for protein-filled foods like lean chicken, hard-boiled egg, a slice or two of brown bread, and freshly squeezed orange juice.
Go easy at 6pm onwards. Eating late on holidays is common. If you’re craving for pasta, rice and other calorie-dense meals, eat them at lunch. Enjoy fresh vegetable salad, sandwich and a glass of wine maybe for dinner.
Be alcohol savvy. Alternate alcoholic drinks with water to avoid hangover and dehydration. You will also be reducing your calorie intake this way. Furthermore, try spirits with low-calorie mixers and don’t forget to “drink moderately”.
Drop the guilt. It won’t help you with anything – it will just make you feel worse this holiday season. What’s more, new research from the University of Canterbury in New Zealand has found that people who felt guilty after overeating tend to gain more weight than those who didn’t feel guilty. The researchers emphasised that the diet controlling habit of guilt ridden-women gets abandoned once they are guilt ridden.
Hope you find these tips useful. Have a wonderful, delicious and fulfilling holiday ahead!